“HELP LORD, I HAVE A SPECIAL NEED”

Motherhood and special needs parenting 

There was something about spending countless days, months, years in hospitals that were both chaotic and peaceful when motherhood came a calling”.

No one could have ever prepared me enough for what I was about to experience; no bright red “caution” signals of life, warning me of the twists and turns ahead. I’ll be darned if Special Needs Parenting was not for Parents who were special. Truth be told, How can any parent ever be prepared enough?

What Rest?

If you’ve spent any amount of time in hospitals you know it’s the last place you want to be if you want to rest. The constant beeping of the monitors, the sound of hurried feet outside the triage, the constant chatter, and sudden moments of interruption by nurses entering in and out every couple hours; neither sleep nor shut eye were welcomed to rest on my heavy eyelids. It was just impossible to rest. But like a light at the end of a tunnel, the momentary imprisonment inside the dimly lit four walls began to fill with flickers of hope and yearning for a deeper meaning of my forced abode.

Inspiration through Indignation

It was during this very trying time I found the courage and and time to reflect, to read, and focus on THE purpose of my pain. Already weakened with discouragement, my feeble faith should’ve faltered., Faith without works was as worthless as salt without savor. Instead, I fastened myself to what faith I had left. I clung to every ounce of faith that still remained. And just as faith intended, I found the strength to press forward. I found my second wind. My heart was filled with an unexplainable peace thus making the way for me to choose joy instead of anger and gratitude instead of frustration.

The Glass was Half full

My perception was altered for good. Instead of focusing on my dilemma, I began to delight in this momentary affliction of my soul. I decided I would delight in God’s purpose for this journey of my life rather than dwell in a desert of tears and many unanswered questions. Night waned and Dawn came on. The time had come to focus on the positive. The glass was no longer half empty.

THE GOD WHO SEES

Don’t get me wrong I cried so many tears, but they weren’t of hopelessness. I cried because I hated causing my child pain. I cried because I would’ve given anything to switch places with him. Every time I would hit that low point I would remember the unchanging love and promise of God. He would never give me more than I could handle. I began making a conscientious effort to remember that God saw me fit to care and raise this baby. Otherwise I would not have had him.

Purpose through pain

The purpose was bigger than the both of us. It was about a Big God who has Big plans for both me and my child.My child is a gift from God. I realized I was privileged to be gifted.. Could I actually insult God by not giving gratitude. NOPE. Not to mention, to my amazement, this sweet boy didn’t even cry. His silence was an assurance from God to me. My child knew and was telling me that everything was going to be ok. Just like him, I too was special. After all it takes someone very special to be endowed with a very special task. Life did not seem that unfair anymore.

AN ODE TO MY SON

You’re the son I always knew I’d have. The one I dreamed of. The king I knew I’d raise.Its not the journey I would’ve chosen. Not for my own ego or selfishness, but for you because the world can be so cruel. However, with every fiber of my being I choose you and I always will. Until my last breath and beyond. I choose you as I was chosen.

AN ODE TO ALL PARENTS WITH SPECIAL NEEDS CHILDREN

And To All Parents who go the extra mile. Remember God chose You!

YOU ARE BLESSED

It May Feel More Like a Curse sometimes,

But having a special needs child brings with it abundant

Opportunities for Grace.

It slows you down and allows you to enjoy the little things -

A calm quiet day, a hard won skill, a spontaneous hug

A pleasant conversation.

Where other parents are driven to find their children’s success In high grades

And high scores on the playing field,

You are granted the privilege of focusing on the things that really matter,

Teaching your children how to love and care and

communicate on the most basic level.

You know what’s important and because you are not caught up in

Trivialities you are able to appreciate that so much more deeply.

Miracles happen everyday, if only you know where to look for them.

- Author, Unknown (Pinterest)